Please Help Name My Domain?

I am looking to purchase a domain name. I need something people can remember, spell, is "catchy" and/or speaks to the topics of my books (infertility, loss, fruit of the Spirit, hope, motherhood, illness, heartache, grace, various Biblical heroes like Hannah, Job, Paul). Any suggestions or ideas? I like jennifer.saake but wonder if the spelling of our last name will become an issue? Most domains of my actual book titles are already taken (like the StrokeOfGrace domain, though I could still use these words with hyphenation between them or adding on the word "book" at the end like I did with HannahsHopeBook.com), plus you need a new one for each project and I'm looking for something I could list all books, blogs and any future affiliated projects and ministries under. Maybe something with my used-around-the-internet handle of InfertilityMom, but will that be confusing for people that don't know my background? I've used Jenni's Journal for several projects over the years, so something along those lines might work. I was thinking maybe something alone the lines of ChronicallyTrustingChrist but that is LONG for a domain name. I also love roses, and themes of harvest, gardening and growth. Someone suggested something butterfly related (cocoon, chrysalis (<---- already="" and="" anything="" but="" can="" etc="" find="" flight="" give="" go.="" hard="" i="" ideas="" like="" me="" not="" ready.="" really="" short="" simple="" soaring="" span="" spell="" t="" taken="" takes="" that="" to="" transformation="" wing="" wings="" word="" your="">

Friday :)

I think I'm going to put my "Fiction Fridays" feature on hold for a few weeks as I read back through your previous review comments and decide where I'm headed from here. :) Thanks for all the great feedback. It was exciting to see how popular those review posts seemed to be.

My body's telling me it's got to be a quiet day at home today. My kids all seem to be trying to fight off a little something too, so I think we are going to do a lot of reading and have a fairly light school day. Looking forward to a weekend with my sweet hubby home before he heads to ChirpTweet next week.

Since this blog is focused on both motherhood and infertility, I had to share another sweet blog I stumbled across this week. Me vs. You is written by two sisters, one dealing with infertility (now finally a mom to one) and the other highly fertile (5 kids in 7 years). It is a reflection of their journey through sisterhood together as they each saw their families unfold in such different ways, wanting to continue being deeply devoted sisters, yet the pain of circumstances often getting in the way. They take a unique approach with their blog, inviting questions from their readers, then each sister answering from her own perspective. I obviously haven't read every post in the extensive history there, but was really impressed with the loving and candid advice I did have a chance to read. (And it didn't hurt my feelings at all when the infertile sister suggested Hannah's Hope as a resource for her readers this week, thus triggering my Google alert and allowing me to find their blog in the first place. ;) )

I bought myself a little treat last week and am enthralled by the beautiful pictures, along with a surprising amount of information, packed into In the Footsteps of Paul by the photographer behind the movie, "The Passion," Ken Duncan. A feast for my eyes and refreshment for my soul. :) What a joy to see my own book on Paul continue to take life over this past week as well.



In other news, our taxes are finally filed!!! Yeah! (I knew you couldn't survive another minute without knowing that vital piece of information. But it was a BIG DEAL to me, and has been a huge focus in our household these past several weeks, thus noteworthy for this blog. ;) ) It was nice to finally see all those medical expenses from 2009 do us some good in the form of tax deductions.

Fiction Fridays: Long Awaited Child

I won't typically "review" a book that I haven't personally read cover-to-cover, but as I'm running low on my supply of fiction fertility-related titles to share with you, I'm going to take a leap of faith and borrow a review from a trusted source, the Stepping Stones Christian infertility ministry. I do intent to eventually pick up The Long Awaited Child by Tracie Peterson, but just haven't had the chance yet.

From the Stepping Stones bookstore review: "Novelist Tracie Peterson has written or co-written over 35 novels. This novel is the dual story of a woman, who wants nothing more than to be a mother, and a frightened pregnant teen, who wants nothing more than to run away from that responsibility. Be ready for some tears as you read how each of them overcomes past heartache to give the other her heart's desire."



While I haven't read The Long Awaited Child, I have read other books by Tracie including the Alaskan Quest series (not "infertility-friendly" but a fantastic read). Have you read any books by Tracie? If so, what were your thoughts?

As I draw to the bottom of my pile of infertility / loss fiction titles here, what would you like to see next? Would you prefer to see me move into other fiction topics, or would you like reviews of more fertility-related books from the non-fiction category? I want to provide a valuable resource here, so please let me know what you would like to read! I'm always looking for great Christian titles to share with my friends, so if you can suggest other titles, please leave me a comment about the book and why it would be of interest to InfertilityMom blog readers.

Fiction Fridays: Karen Kingsbury

Karen Kingsbury has too many fertility-related stories for me to even list. Visit her website (where you can read her own adoption story!) at KarenKingsbury.com

I'm currently enjoying the Red Gloves Collection. So far my favorite title there is Gideon's Gift. It's not an infertility story (well, one daughter is an only child and there is implication that the parents wanted more) but does involve adult loss and the grief journey. Incredibly touching!



What's your favorite Karen Kingsburry title (related to fertility challenges or otherwise)? Why? Please share!

Fiction Fridays: Leisha Kelly

Last week I reviewed Julia's Last Hope by Janette Oke. A similar title with a totally different storyline, Julia's Hope by Leisha Kelly, is not a story about fertility challenges, but rather depicts one family's struggle through the great depression of the 1930s. If you are up to reading a beautiful story about the fierce love of motherhood, enjoy this sweet read.

Fiction Fridays: Janette Oke

Several books by Janette Oke include infertility and/or loss themes:

The Love Comes Softly series, while the main character is quite fertile, also includes a subplot of a friend with recurrent losses and eventually giving birth to her only living son with special needs. Later in the same series, there is stillbirth.

Canadian West series, especially by the second and later books, is very much an infertility story and also includes adoption loss and fulfilled adoption dreams.


A Bride for Donnigan has the main character being very unsympathetic with her friend's miscarriage grief until she herself suffers a stillborn baby.

Julia's Last Hope depicts an after-infertility mom of twins who opens her home as a bed-and-breakfast. Her first client is a pregnant teen who is sent away to give birth and relinquish her child for adoption to save the wealthy family from disgrace. Julia gives a great representation of the processing of after-infertility emotions and I could relate to many of her conversations with God.

Janette's books are typically light, quick reading. Some even consider them "fluff" but I "cut my teeth" on Christian fiction with these as a teenager and Janette's stories will always hold a very special place in my heart. I know she has other titles that are strong fertility-related plot lines, but these are the ones that come to mind off the top of my head. Do you have any to add to this list?

Fiction Fridays: Marriage Wish

The Marriage Wish by Dee Henderson is about a young widow who goes into preterm labor shortly after the death of her husband and their little girl lives only 3 month, all in the NICU. It's a tearjerker for sure, but very realistic in dealing with the grief emotions that she processes as she slowly learns to risk loving again.



Have you read any good fiction that deals with pregnancy loss or infant death in a profound way? I'm always looking for great Christian reads that will minister to hurting hearts in the process of offering entertainment. Please let me know what's on your bookshelf that my readers might enjoy!

Fiction Fridays: Sharon Souza

Every Good and Perfect Gift by Sharon Souza is an emotional and fascinating read. While infertility plays a staring roll early on, it becomes a back story to the main plot line (focused on early-onset Alzheimer's) as the story unfolds. Readers who have lived infertility will resound with the fears and frustrations and will be delighted by the depth of loving friendship and self-sacrifice that draws two couples together in the pursuit of a single child. While I found a few technical flaws with the medical side of infertility presented in this story ("decongestant" cough syrup will dry up cervical mucus, not aid in its production) many of the experiences, questions and emotional processing of the characters is spot on.

Fiction Fridays: Marlo Schalesky

Empty Womb, Aching Heart: Hope and Help for Those Struggling With Infertility by Marlo Schalesky is a fictionalized compilation of many real-life infertility stories, including my friend Julie Donahue's real life adoption story (see the "Mom2Ways" button on my sidebar for a link to Julie's blog). Spanning all aspects of fertility challenges. The short stories are fast reading, realistic and great at getting to the emotional and spiritual heart of each challenge.



Have you found a book that captures the heart of your fertility or loss journey through the use of fiction? I would love to hear about your favorite reads!

Fiction Fridays: Angela Hunt

Angela Hunt has written many compelling titles. While not directly related to infertility, both The Pearl and Unspoken were thought provoking for me. I would not advise reading either when feeling emotionally fragile, and since not written specifically for an infertile audience, there will be things that might not sit well.
The Pearl deals with the death of a child and a mother's depth of grief that drives to a splintered marriage and desperate measures including cloning.
Unspoken is a sweet story for anyone with a loving "Fur Baby" (animal/pet that is a stand-in child) in her life, though it does also relate a lot to grief (and has a subplot of miscarriage through another character). I'll warn you upfront that the ending is rather tragic.

I have never read The Truth Teller by this same author but believe it is a story about an infertile woman who is widowed and tries to still have her husband's child - as with any of Hunt's books, I would expect there to be a lot of plot twisting, no easy answers and ethically challenging complexity involved. Is this a title you have read? If so, would you recommend it? Why or why not? I would love to hear your thoughts. :)

Have you read any titles by Angela? How have you been impacted by this author's writing style? Can you suggest other authors who have tackled the challenging topics of infertility or loss in their fiction writing? Did they do a good job, or did their depictions of your experiences leave you wanting? Please share!

Fiction Fridays: Rain Dance

Rain Dance by Joy DeKok (also a past Hannah's Prayer member, still living with primary infertility) is a compelling story about what happens when a Christian woman facing a childless future and a woman seeking an abortion are waiting to see the same doctor. The infertile woman feels like she could have been pulled from the pages of my journals! I know abortion is a sensitive topic, especially while facing infertility, but this book is amazing.



To find out more about Joy, her passions and other titles she has written, please visit her at JoyDeKok.com.

What hidden infertility/loss plots have you discovered in your fiction reading? Have specific books been helpful or hurtful as you have read? Please share your finds by posting a "comment" to this topic!

Fiction Fridays: Chosen

When I first started this blog I had intended to run a Fiction Fridays topic, posting about interesting Christian fiction books or authors, especially those touching on the topics of infertility or loss. I didn't get very far into this goal before life got crazy and the idea got pushed to the side, so this week I'm pre-setting book reviews to post for the next several Fridays to make sure that I stay on track.

Please leave your input! I would love to hear your experiences with these books or if there are other titles you have read that others might find interesting. As a "comments" reply here, please give the title, author, and enough about the plot line that someone can decide if they are "ready" to give that book a read or if there are any unexpected surprises that could be painful triggers if caught by surprise.

Today's selection is:



Chosen: The Lost Diaries of Queen Esther by Ginger Garrett (this author is a former member of Hannah's Prayer, by the way) is a fictionalized look at Esther, and in Ginger's telling of the story, she is never able to bear children. Spellbinding reading! Chosen first released by NavPress in 2005 and an updated version will be re-released by David C. Cook on March 1, 2010, but is available for pre-order in Kindle or print formats now.



Find out more about Ginger, enjoy her wonderful blog, and learn many great beauty secrets and interesting historical facts at GingerGarrett.com.

Fiction Fridays meet Marlo Schalesky

Today I would like to start a new feature on this blog and call it "Fiction Fridays." No, I won't have a new fiction book to feature every single Friday, but hopefully about once a month I will share with you a book that I've enjoyed, starting with a few featuring infertility in the plotlines, since obviously this is a topic near and dear to my heart.

Allow me to introduce you to Marlo Schalesky, award winning author of seven books including the wonderful resource Empty Womb, Aching Heart: Hope and Help for Those Struggling With Infertility and several fiction titles including her newest release If Tomorrow Never Comes. You can read my book reviews on Amazon, so I'll now turn this blog over to Marlo for a guest post on her personal journey through infertiltiy and how her own story has impacted the storyline of If Tomorrow Never Comes...




Infertility. I’ve lived with it for most of my adult life. Walked with it, fought with it, bargained with it. It’s challenged my faith, robbed my bank account, and made me into a stronger, braver woman. From it, I’ve written a nonfiction book on infertility (Empty Womb, Aching Heart) and a novel exploring the affects of infertility on a marriage (my newly released If Tomorrow Never Comes, the second of my Love Stories With a Twist!). Today, I find that most everything I know about God, His love, myself, and the wonder of a life lived with Jesus, I’ve learned on the infertility journey.

But it wasn’t always that way. Early in the journey, for months upon months, my Bible sat on the shelf, unopened and unread, my prayer journal lay unused, and my attendance at church became sporadic at best. I didn’t want to talk about God, I didn’t want to read about God, and I certainly didn’t want to pray.

Then, one day I was cleaning out the closet in our spare room when I found a box filled with college treasures. In it was a small book with peonies on the front. I opened the cover and discovered pages and pages filled with my own writing. I sat on the floor, with my back against the closet door, and rubbed one hand over the first page. “Junior Year,” it read in big purple letters. Purple had always been my favorite color. I flipped to about half way through and began to read.

I saw the sunrise today, Lord. It was amazing. I wish I could say that I saw it because I was up early to pray, but as You know, I had to pull an all-nighter to get that paper done. But it was worth it to see the streaks of orange, red, and gold at the dawn of a new day. I stood there and thought to myself, I know the One who made that sunrise. The same One who lives in me. You know, I can feel You there, Lord, in my heart. Some days, like today, Your love is a tangible thing, like a warm blanket that wraps around my insides. In these moments, I feel like I could shout to the stars about what an awesome, incredible, super-wow God You are. I can’t believe there was ever a time when I turned my back on You. What a fool I was. But everything’s different now, God. My life, my heart, is filled with the wonder of knowing You. I’ll never forget this feeling. I’ll never forget to keep loving You. I promise . . .

Tears came to my eyes as I read the words and remembered the day I wrote them. I remembered how nothing else mattered as much as knowing and loving God. But a lot had changed since then. Too much had changed.

I sat there, with my back pressing against the closet door and the old journal resting against my knees, and realized how much I missed my relationship with God. There was a pain, a loneliness, in me that went even deeper than not having children. In these last months, I’d lost something more precious than my hope for a child. I’d lost my closeness with God. And that had made my heart even emptier than my womb. Yet, even though I missed my relationship with God, I could still feel the anger that was lodged in my heart like a huge stone, burying me in my self-made tomb. How could I ever be free? How could I ever get past my pain?
I rose from the floor slowly and grabbed a pen from the top drawer of the desk by the door. Then, I reached up and took another journal from the shelves above. I blew off a layer of dust from the book’s cover, sat down at the desk, and began to write.

God, it’s me, you know, the one who keeps asking you for a baby. Well, I’m so mad at You I could just spit . . .
I wrote for an hour, pouring out my bitterness, my anger, my hurt. And with every word I wrote, I drew a little closer to God. He drew a little closer to me. So I continued journaling my frustrations, my prayers, my hopes. And as the months passed, I began to see God’s hand at work in my life. God hadn’t abandoned me as I had once thought. Instead, He was taking me on a life path that would help me to see more clearly, whether I was blessed with children or not. And on that road, God was asking me to love, to trust, even in the midst of my pain.

That day when I opened my journal, I began a long, slow journey back to God, a journey that’s reflected in the main character in my latest novel, If Tomorrow Never Comes. There, Kinna Henley faces the same questions, the same doubts, and a similar journey back to God. She, too, finds a new kind of strength and sacrifice through her journey through infertility. She finds that God understands her anger, hears her fury, accepts her hurt. And she discovers that true strength and bravery is found in choosing to love sacrificially, instead of clinging to her dreams.

Infertility taught me to see God’s love for me in new ways, not linked to whether or not I would have children, but rather how this life of mine fits into the whole of God’s Kingdom. I’ve come to think that might be the question that really matters.
In the end, my infertility taught me that it’s good to wrestle with God for the answers I need. It’s good to cry out, to keep turning to God with all my doubts, all my anger, all my pain. It’s better to shout than to be silent, better to call God unkind than to not call at all.

And it’s only when I learned that, only when I surrendered all my dreams, doubts, and difficulties to God, that He eventually gave me children through extensive treatment. Today, I have a nine-year-old daughter born after infertility surgery and an intrauterine insemination, another daughter born after a miscarriage, a year of failed inseminations, two failed in-vitro fertilizations, and finally a successful frozen embryo transfer, 3-year-old twins born after another frozen embryo transfer, and finally a miracle 5-month old born after four miscarriages and all our frozen embryos were used up … a long journey with 11 years before the first was born followed by nine more years of treatments with a few successes and a lot of failures – a lifetime, practically, molded by infertility, the journey, the doubts, the struggles, the difficulties … and the lessons that I wouldn’t have learned, couldn’t have learned, if God hadn’t taken me down that long path.

So, today, through my life journey, and through Kinna’s, I share that God doesn’t condemn us for those doubts. All He asks is that we bring our frustration, fears, anger, and questions to Him. He can handle it. He has big shoulders, as big as the sunrise.

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FOR MORE ABOUT MARLO . . .
Please visit her website at www.marloschalesky.com and check out the audio interview, infertility resources, and other goodies there. She would love for you to sign up for her e-newsletter, "which I put out a few times a year (or whenever there’s exciting news like a book release!). You can sign up on the front page of my website." There’s a sign-up box there on the right hand column above the audio/video player.




Also, please visit her blog at www.marloschalesky.blogspot.com. About once a week she post news and hopefully helpful info on rekindling the wonder in our walks with God.