Monday, December 29, 2014

Late December 2014

A recap of recent days:

A week ago Friday I had a 2-hour interview with three sweet ladies from my hospital's publicity group, an hour of that on film with two big light and two cameras just a couple feet away from my face. That night I went out to hubby work Christmas party. I love playing dress up, though it does take a lot out of me.
Last Monday, two of those ladies met me at my new gym to film my water exercise class (had been on a two week trial membership there, with last Monday being the first day of the official new membership my in laws blessed me with for Christmas - what a way to make an entry, showing up with a film crew on my first day as a member! LOL). That afternoon my parents took us across town for an emergency orthodontic repair for our daughter.
Sunday was our 15-year-old's birthday. After dinner that night, I went out into the cold and learned about muscle "spasticity" on a whole new level. My hubby steadied me and helped me hobble to the car, thankfully avoiding the piggy-back-ride we actually considered.
The weekend through Wednesday morning found me madly cleaning, organizing, doing laundry, wrapping gifts (quite a trick with clumsy hands that can only master gift bagging but not tape scissors or wrap, or a long-enough term memory to even know what is in the bag I just packed before I get it half way from our bedroom to the tree - I only made one major blunder in forgetting my brother-in-laws gift at all, but I got to be as surprised as our kids were on Christmas morning as they unwrapped their gifts) and packing.
Tuesday night we attended a Christmas Eve-Eve service and I wore ear plugs (to help me be able to tolerate the neuro stimulation of the music. Even though I already have much hearing loss, what I do hear, I do not process correctly, thus cannot tolerate loud sounds without nausea and confusion and physical pain.) and Signed (because I could not hear myself sing) all the Christmas carols.
Early Wednesday afternoon (24th) we were all loaded in the car and headed to my in-laws' farm about an hour away.

Thursday, we spent with 11 family members and two bathrooms, later in the day, joined by an adopted sister and her friend as well. I was in bed around 8pm, both Wednesday and Thursday nights!
Friday was a rest and family games day. The 27th marked exactly 20 years since I learned my body not only disliked the idea of GETTING pregnant but that CARRYING a baby was to be equally as challenging. I'm still trying to unwrap all the emotions of miscarriage when mixed with a mother's earthly grief, longing and loneliness and the wonder my own near death experience and transformed understanding of Noel's Heavenly reality.
Saturday, we came home to piles and PILES of clean laundry to be sorted then all those Christmas blessings to get put into new homes. I also took my first shower since Wednesday one I had access to a shower chair and hand rails again.
Sunday was church, then roast left overs with in-laws and more games. About 4 more hours working on that clean laundry yesterday afternoon!
Today has been water therapy, my parents went and adopted a cat. And now to get dinner started.
Tomorrow night we are getting together with some dear friends, visiting back here from out of state. Their son was our 15-year-old's best buddy when they were 4 years old! Kathy is coming to help me un-decorate my tree tomorrow!
Insurance and some family medical testing feel like a yo-yo ride too. Not even planning to work on my book anymore until kids go back to school Jan. 8. I still haven't finished all that laundry putting away yet.
This past week, we did confirm my decision that I am going to cut a few inches off my hair. Not that I don't love the length it has finally reached, but because I cannot manage this length alone now. I want it to still brush my shoulders or come a little bit past, but I've got to be able to get a brush through it myself, something that I haven't been able to do in at least 6 or 8 weeks now since the length has become unmanageable.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Please Help Name My Domain?

I am looking to purchase a domain name. I need something people can remember, spell, is "catchy" and/or speaks to the topics of my books (infertility, loss, fruit of the Spirit, hope, motherhood, illness, heartache, grace, various Biblical heroes like Hannah, Job, Paul). Any suggestions or ideas? I like jennifer.saake but wonder if the spelling of our last name will become an issue? Most domains of my actual book titles are already taken (like the StrokeOfGrace domain, though I could still use these words with hyphenation between them or adding on the word "book" at the end like I did with, plus you need a new one for each project and I'm looking for something I could list all books, blogs and any future affiliated projects and ministries under. Maybe something with my used-around-the-internet handle of InfertilityMom, but will that be confusing for people that don't know my background? I've used Jenni's Journal for several projects over the years, so something along those lines might work. I was thinking maybe something alone the lines of ChronicallyTrustingChrist but that is LONG for a domain name. I also love roses, and themes of harvest, gardening and growth. Someone suggested something butterfly related (cocoon, chrysalis (<---- already="" and="" anything="" but="" can="" etc="" find="" flight="" give="" go.="" hard="" i="" ideas="" like="" me="" not="" ready.="" really="" short="" simple="" soaring="" span="" spell="" t="" taken="" takes="" that="" to="" transformation="" wing="" wings="" word="" your="">

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Please SHARE!!!

 My Chiropractic Stroke Survival Story

I am a chiropractic stroke survivor. They tell me I should not be alive today. My doctor knew what happened. He didn't carry any insurance (common in the industry) and left the country, leaving us and our personal medical insurance (thankful for that!) to deal with my $1.5 million in anticipated medical expenses.

Medicine will tell you chiropractic stroke is a "rare" event. I submit to you that it is only considered rare because there are no accurate statistical reporting mechanisms in place! I think if anyone realized how often this happens, they would be shocked. Instead, individual records get buried under privacy laws and no one has access to the real numbers. 

Please help us pass a mandatory reporting law, where individual information stays private but a hospital is simply asked to report if they see a stroke patient who has recently received a cervical neck manipulation. That's it, just raw numbers! Chiropractic stroke - not rare, just dreadfully UNDER-REPORTED! Please help us prove that! 

Please sign the petition at and share this with 5 friends!

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

December 10,2014

Our first daughter (now in Heaven) was conceived exactly 20 years ago. (When you are facing infertility, with all the cycle charting and medical invasion into your private life, you tend to know these things!) December 10 cannot pass without me thinking of this date as a "Noel Day". (Her name is Noel Alexis, our "Christmas Minister of Needs," who finally blessed us to become parents.)

We have also lived in this house exactly 10 years today!

My husband and I went and had our wills drawn up today. Hopefully it will be another 10 or 20 (or more) years before they are ever put into action, but it seemed fitting that the lawyer offered us this date to take our next big "grown up" step in life.

Just feeling reflective tonight...

Monday, December 1, 2014

To Parents With Genetic Special Needs

I found this article today. Knowing that I have MANY special needs Mommy friends, I wanted to pass it along. A Letter to The "Before Me" (for those new to diagnosis or still in the investigation stage).

"I know about the day when you open your computer and first Google a condition you’ve never heard of. I know that you’ll sit there for hours upon hours, reading, making notes, crying, watching videos, not believing that those moments are really happening.
Not yet realizing that the before is no longer. This is the nether-time. Time suspended. Over the next few days, you will live through the most trying days of your life – days that will forever split your life into two parts.
So before you enter the after, I’d like to offer some advice..."

Thursday, November 20, 2014

The Song GIVE-A-WAY!

I was recently asked to review a couple's devotional book. I'll be honest and say I wasn't too enthused about the prospect, seeing as the title, Awaken Love, and focus passage, Song of Solomon, left me to figure the book would basically just be focusing on how to "spice up your sex life". When the book got here and I saw chapter titles like, "Deepening Desire" and "Increasing Intimacy," I literally rolled my eyes and thought "here we go."

I was pleasantly surprised that 86-page, softcover book is truly a Christ-centered activity guide to drawing closer and learning to more closely cherish AND EXPRESS this, to your spouse, in so many different ways. Much of the interaction between Solomon and his bride-to-be are used to expound upon the love Jesus has for us His Bride, that in turn should lead us to desire to communicate deeper care to the person we share our lives with. As the subtitle indicates, this book is about the "journey to Awaken Love in marriage" and I so appreciate how the entire relationship is considered and focused on, rather than many marriage books that seem to focus primarily on the physical (and the emotional in order to better set up the physical).

Daily readings are really only a couple minutes long and suggested activities could often be accomplished in 5 minutes or less, but could help re-set thought patterns for a very long time to come. Not a bad time investment in the one you love! They are often the kinds of activities that could have much more time and thought poured into them over the course of the day, or week, or month, if you so desire. 

For example one suggestion is to take your spouse's name and create an acrostic of character traits about this person that are meaningful to you. Yes, there is great value if you fill in the blanks during a sliver of time, then share it with your husband/wife on your way out the door. And taking a few days to really contemplate and ask the Lord to help you remember and recognize meaningful characteristics in the one you married is great too. Maybe even do both, 2 different list with both the immediate thoughts and long-term meditations? (That "do both" idea is mine, not from the book, but you can see how the simple thoughts and suggestions there can feed your own creativity!)

I am pleased to share that I will be able to request a free copy of Awaken Love to be sent to one of my blog readers (US & Canada only). If you would like to be entered for a chance to win your own copy of Awaken Love, please leave your name and email address (so I may contact you if you win, to request your mailing address) in the comments here. For a second entry, please visit another one of my blogs, StrokeOfGrace.blogspot, and join that page through the Google Friend Connect (right hand sidebar) then come back to this post and leave a second comment, telling me that you did. Oh, and for every place (Twitter, Facebook, your own blog) you share this post, you can earn additional entries for each of those as well, just leave separate comments linking to where you did!

Drawing open until noon (Pacific) on Friday, December 5, 2014. Winner notified on Saturday, December 6. Winner must respond by noon on Monday, December 8, or alternate winner will be selected. 
Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.
If you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.

The Song Couple’s Devotional is a 6-week book for couples that can help awaken love in their marriage. With daily relationship insights and prayer points drawn from the Song of Solomon, this devotional will help couples grow in their relationship with God and one another. 

Inspired by the Song of Solomon, The Song is both a full-length movie and resource for churches to explore God’s plan for relationships, love and marriage.

About the author:

Kyle Idleman is the Teaching Pastor at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky, the fourth-largest church in America. Author of the award-winning and bestselling book, not a fan., and presenter of eight of City on a Hill’s curriculum series, he regularly speaks at conferences and events around the world. Kyle and his wife DesiRae have four children.

Wednesday, November 12, 2014


A little snippet from my rough draft of Harvesting Hope from Heartache

I've always struggled with how what the devil intends for our harm, God not only USES, but the Bible says, in Joseph's story, God actually INTENDS for our good. Then yesterday my 8-year-old was recounting when we had taken him out to a fancy, grill-at-your-table Japanese place earlier in the year. The chef asked him to "juggle" raw eggs, knowing full well what would happen. Had he tried to juggle them over my floor, he would have gotten in trouble. But when the chef instructed him to juggle them over his grill, the inevitable crash of scrambled eggs was clearly part of his skillful recipe for our meal. Yes, it is easy to question when all we can see is the midst of the mess! So glad God not only sees, but designs, the bigger picture! - (c) Jennifer Saake, 2014